October 11, 2004
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Great moons of Neptune! The Niners won! The Niners won! Time to run around naked and smear my body in peanut butter.
Imagine what I do when we win Super Bowls!
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Back from Chicago. Must admit it feels good to be back in Houston. There are a few things I like about Chicago.
The weather, of course. Although it was kinda hot this weekend, that cold ass breeze sent a lovely shiver up my spine. Man, I haven't had that feeling in a long time. It's like I quit smack for a year and just jumped back on it. I'm hooked.
Old buildings and skyscrapers are a favorite of mine, too. I gawk and stare like a stupid kid because I am definitely a stupid kid.
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I know Houston doesn't need high rise condos and apartments, but when they do build them, could they be built any uglier?
There's this one building around the 59 freeway that looks like an elevator shaft. Some people have told me it looks like a giant dildo, but I tend to not listen to these people.
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Some things I did not enjoy in Chicago:
Traffic. Christ, where are all of you assholes going? And I do mean assholes. Judging by Illionois-ites inability to stay within those dotted lines on freeways, kindergarten classes have a slew of hideous crayon scribbled pictures.
The food wasn't too good. Our client took us to this awful japanese fusion place with horrible faux drum and bass/acid jazz. After dropping four hundred bucks at this place, I was beer buzzed, hungry, disappointed, and very grumpy.
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Oh yeah. And Chicago is one ugly city. Not one hot chick. Not one. I suspect the corn fed blondes of Omaha are prettier and probably of decent shape.
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I have this theory. Women who grow up in big cities with colder climates have smaller boobs. They've become so anal retentive and bound by six layers of clothing that their boobies fail to expand correctly. In warmer climates, you'll see some bigger knockers.
It's like how a flower grows in an open sunny field as compared to the crap you find growing in the cracks of concrete in a cold city. Too bad I'm more of a cold city person. Maybe I need a St. Pauli's girl. They're pretty laid back (well endowed), right?
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By the way, I have a right to call people ugly. I myself am a member of ugly, but you need to be honest with yourself just as I am. You will increase your chances of suicide and my level of happiness.
Comments (4)
haha nice theory
interesting theory. How about southern girls? I think they have nice big boobs. oh yeah, those white knifes of Ming Tsai's are pretty nice, I almost got one couple yrs ago, but i couldn't afford a knife that expensive. And I think white washed asian are just as good as the other asian, definitely better than the fobs, not that I am dissing the fobs, but in terms of potential love ones, white washed are better than fobs.
i wonder if your theory is right. i always blamed my lack of tits on bad asian genes, but you could be onto something. and i wonder if it applies to guys as well.
would colder climate mean smaller cock?
"i have the right to call people ugly"
i second that, totally.
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