February 27, 2005





  • Lately I've been typing out letters, words, sentences, and paragraphs that make absolutely no sense. The delete key has been my best friend and you know that's a bad thing. Writers with an over-reliance on the delete key always realize one thing. That thing is blockage and sometimes it sucks worse than constipation.

    You know what's worse than that, though? I haven't shat in like two days. I'm bracing myself for some toilet time tonight.



    My premonition is that my creative juices will overflow right when I let these pieces of shit out of my ass.



    Otherwise, life is pretty good. The house got a deep cleaning this weekend and everything is spotless. A crew made up of a half dozen Mexican girls came in at 8am yesterday and scrubbed the shit out of this place. The water in the toilet is so clean right now that I'd be willing to bet five dollars it could cure that new super HIV strain in New York.



    I'm going to have to cut this entry short. Time to take a shit. Maybe I'll get some writing done tonight.



    Guess what I'll be singing on my toilet.


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